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My girlfriend

Nice to see the thread has grown took me ages to catch up.

btw miggy
Pigs speedy? :Yikes: what will our Muslim friends say. pmpl
Why only select muslims ?
Jews don't eat pork and a strict christian who follows the bible blindly doesn't either (Leviticus 11:7 and Deuteronomy 14:8)

As the food rules for muslims and christians come from the jewish torah I was curious as to why you selected muslims over jews.
 
Nice to see the thread has grown took me ages to catch up.

btw miggy

Why only select muslims ?
Jews don't eat pork and a strict christian who follows the bible blindly doesn't either (Leviticus 11:7 and Deuteronomy 14:8)

As the food rules for muslims and christians come from the jewish torah I was curious as to why you selected muslims over jews.

didnt no that .... but never heard any 1 else banging on about it ??? . thats y the internet can be great but also be a tit and to pc.. thats were havng a sence of humour kicks in ;)
 
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Nice to see the thread has grown took me ages to catch up.

btw miggy

Why only select muslims ?
Jews don't eat pork and a strict christian who follows the bible blindly doesn't either (Leviticus 11:7 and Deuteronomy 14:8)

As the food rules for muslims and christians come from the jewish torah I was curious as to why you selected muslims over jews.

Ffs Ellie I slog my guts out all night trying to keep you feckers entertained and all of a sudden your back with a vengeance. Dude there was no specific reason as to why I chose Muslim I did it because, they was the only race/religion that I could think off. I am not telling porkies Ellie. I am off now mate its suddenly got damn cold in here. :(
 
Ffs Ellie I slog my guts out all night trying to keep you feckers entertained and all of a sudden your back with a vengeance. Dude there was no specific reason as to why I chose Muslim I did it because, they was the only race/religion that I could think off. I am not telling porkies Ellie. I am off now mate its suddenly got damn cold in here. :(

In the interests of balance I will knock another religion. How come this sort of thing is still allowed in a civilised country?

“Don’t tell anyone, but on the pagan day of the sun god Ra, I kneel at the foot of an ancient instrument of torture and consume ritualistic symbols of blood and flesh.”

Well?
 
In the interests of balance I will knock another religion. How come this sort of thing is still allowed in a civilised country?

“Don’t tell anyone, but on the pagan day of the sun god Ra, I kneel at the foot of an ancient instrument of torture and consume ritualistic symbols of blood and flesh.”

Well?

H mate you have it all wrong don't you know these people are doing a great job in decreasing the human population just send them to P nah I won't say it. Its me nerves Doc.
 
Communion blah blah. ALL religion is flawed if you ask me (yes, I know nobody did). The Jews killed Jesus, the Christian crusades pissed everyone off and the Muslims will be forever fooked in light of recent world history... whole groups of people condemned for things that happened thousands of years ago, or blamed out of ignorance for a handful of nutters! You can't have a joke about anything these days without offending somebody and religion is the worst of it all.
 
So, back to the fun!

When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking.

And then I saw her face.

Boom, boom...
 
H not being a Pagan myself I cannot answer fully. The idea is to sacrifice one thing so other souls can be saved. But I suppose you already know that.

As Vectorz has pointed out - it's Holy Communion. It's funny how a choice of words can change your whole perspective :)
 
I took my girlfriend round to see my family today.

My wife went fooking mental.


Anyone else found that the worst part of being caught w*nking by your girlriend is explaining that its technically her fault?

The other day my girlfriend put me in a tough situation; she said, "Do I look fat in this?"
Just before I told her how great she looked, my mouth started moving for me and I said:

"To be fair, it's a small room."

Now that her stuff's gone, the room is actually quite large.

Look out, I'm on a roll...
 
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things that happened thousands of years ago

Actually I'd like to retract that... I meant things made up on a story book. Just think, in thousands of years time people will be eating chocolate broomsticks on the eve of Quidditch Day
 
Of course, the only true religion is Pastafarianism, and the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
The FSM boiled for our sins ya know?
 
Of course, the only true religion is Pastafarianism, and the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
The FSM boiled for our sins ya know?

The thing they most fear is the coming of the Anti-pasta...

...on the other hand they have a great diet!

Walka pasta da bakery, walka pasta da fridge, walka pasta da chocolata, losa da weight!
 
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Actually I'd like to retract that... I meant things made up on a story book. Just think, in thousands of years time people will be eating chocolate broomsticks on the eve of Quidditch Day

You'll be telling me next that Jedi Religion is just fiction ;)
 
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