New Slang Dictionary

davidh

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NEW SLANG DICTIONARY


AEROPLANE BLONDE
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

AUSSIE KISS
Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

BADLY PACKED KEBAB
A vulgar (but still excellent) term for the female genitalia.

BEER COAT
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise
at 3 in the morning.

BEER COMPASS
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a booze
cruise, even though you're too pissed to remember where you live, how you

BEER SCOOTER
The ability to get home after a night out on the booze and not remember it, ie. "I don't even remember getting home last night, I must have caught
the beer scooter".

BOBFOC
Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.

BREAKING THE SEAL
Your first piss in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After
breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be
required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.

BRITNEY SPEARS
Modern Slang for 'beers', eg. "Couple of Britneys please, Doreen".

BUDGIE'S TONGUE
The female erection.

DRINK-LINK
A modern term for a cashpoint machine (ATM). Named so because it is
common to visit one before going out on the booze.

ETCH-A-SKETCH
Trying to draw a smile on a woman's face by twiddling both of her nipples
simultaneously.



FLOGGING ON
Surfing the Internet for some left-handed websites.

F*CK-SH*T-F*CK-SH*T-F*CK-SH*T
The sound made when driving through too narrow a gap at too high a speed.

GOING FOR A McSHIT
Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're
just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is a McSh*t With Lies.

GREYHOUND
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

JOHNNY-NO-STARS
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works
in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying stars
that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training.

MILLENNIUM DOMES
The contents of a Wonderbra, ie. extremely impressive when viewed from the
outside, but there's actually f*ck-all in there worth seeing.

MONKEY BATH
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo! Oo! Oo! Aa!
Aa! Aa!".

MYSTERY BUS
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet
after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the
pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

MYSTERY TAXI
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
up,whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your
bed instead.



NELSON MANDELA
Rhyming Slang for 'Stella' (the lager).

PICASSO ARSE
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got 4
buttocks.




RAGMAN'S COAT
Untidy and unkempt pubic hair, eg. "That mumbler looks quite fit "

SALAD DODGER
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.

STARFISH TROOPER OR ARSETRONAUT
A homosexual.

SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive woman.

TART FUEL or BITCH PISS
Bottled Alcopops, eg. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women.

TITANIC
A lady who goes down first time out.

TODGER DODGER
A lesbian.

UP ON BLOCKS
Menstruating, ie. out of action, a bit like a car in a garage, "I don't
think I'll be in luck tonight lads, the missus is up on blocks".

WALLACE AND GROMIT
Rhyming Slang for 'vomit'.

WANK SEANCE
During a masturbation session, the eerie feeling that you're being
watched with disgust by your dead relatives.

WYNONA RYDER
Rhyming Slang for 'cider', eg. "Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a
bottle of tart fuel please Doreen".
 
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