Does Anxiety turn to violence when pushed ?

[Jooooles]

So Ive recently been put on a 1 to 1 anger course through probation and I have to admit the worker is hitting a few nervous pushing buttons in the right places.

She say,s she can tell by being in my presence I'm not a relaxed person and have anxiety problems when personal questions are asked ?

Yeh right I'm just a private person (I thought) She got my back up in two minutes and said she done it on purpose to see If I would respond.

Anyway she say,s I have so many previous convictions, because I cant handle confrontation, and have a complex about what people think about myself, HUH who doesn't.

Anyway she has suggested a new diet no white bread increased exercise better food spend more time outdoors with nature work etc.

But no medication as she says anger control can be self taught ? yeh right I'm a middle aged bloke ? OK cut the alcohol as-well she suggested, as she says your covering up your feeling of anxiety and it increases anger "I cut it in half last year" I will be on kaliber soon.

But I have decided If I am going to stop my anger fighting getting arrested etc etc I have to try sommick after all what is one year of my life if its going to have a positive affect on the rest of it.

So there,s my kind of rant mixed with a new years resolution so can anybody recommend a good book Beating alcohol anxiety sex addiction and anger changing your ways etc etc would be good. I'm certainly not going to take any medication and she agreed It could be bad for me.

So anybody had a SIMULA problem are can recommend a good book Id be pleased

cheers peoples for any input maybe I could go mackem bashing at the weekends
loose some stress lol :BLOBBY:

 

[Seedy_r0m]

I takes a big man to confront his demons m8.

I'm not being funny, but I think that you'd benefit with some audiobooks to compliment the normal reading matter.

There are hundreds of self help audiobooks out there to help cope with anxiety, addiction etc.

I don't know if these are any good, as I grabbed a stack of them a while ago, but if you do a google for these, they may still be up there:

Stress___Anxiety_Relief.mp3
Rex_Sikes_-_Attitude_Activator.mp3
Randy_Thomas_-_Success_And_Positive_Thinking.mp3
Stress___Anxiety_Relief.mp3
Bob_Griswold_-_Bob_Griswold_s_Super_Strength_Self-Esteem.mp3
Attacking_Anxiety_Relaxation_Session.mp3
Anthony_Robbins_-_Total_Self-Confidence.mp3

I haven't tried this one, but his Stop Smoking book has helped me to give up, and I haven't looked back (over 5 years now).

[ame="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Easy-Way-Stop-Drinking-Revolutionary/dp/1402736479"]The Easy Way to Stop Drinking - Allen Carr.[/ame]

And no, it's not the comedian on telly with the buck teeth

Anyway m8, I wish you all the best with it, it sounds you were on a downward spiral, hopefully by taking these steps you'll improve your quality of life, and all the poor sods around you

 

[sempi]

pm sent with some links to hypnosis mp3's m8

 

[ellie1998]

I have had anger management problems since I was a teenager.

I don't start trouble but also won't back down if I feel I am being confronted, due to this insecurity I have been stabbed and bottled over the years.

I have been much calmer since packing in getting stoned and am much calmer with my new wife (Goldie) everyone has noticed the change in me.

No magic answer i'm afraid but remove as much stress from your life as possible which is easier said than done. Also don't dwell if you lapse and have an outburst of anger.

 

[Captin]

I do sometimes think that it's the company one keeps that can make a difference.

I used to have some pretty violent outbursts with my first wife and my girlfriend after her, they just know how to push my buttons and start me off. No phsycal acts againts them though, just smashine the house up and lots of shouting.

I decided to change the type of woman I was looking for, and have been with my wife now for 13 years and have not had 1 heated confrontation.

 

[Seedy_r0m]

Here's some more self-help audio.

If you copy any of these lines and paste them into Google, then it should display the links to the files.

You may come across some illegal versions of these on the net, but disregard them and click on the official sites, this will allow you to purchase them legally

Anthony_Robbins_-_Total_Self-Confidence.mp3
The_Power_Of_Hypnosis_And_The_Magic_Of_Your_Mind.mp3
The_Changeworks_-_Hypnosis_Session.mp3
Sylvia_Browne_-_Self_Hypnosis.mp3
Overcome_Shyness_-_Sleep_Learning.mp3
Memory_Improvement_-_Part_1.mp3
Memory_Improvement_-_Part_2.mp3
Dr._Lee_Pulos_-_Meditation_Warner_Audio_Self_Hypnosis.mp3
D.ick_Sutphen_-_4_Hour_Restoritive_Sleep_Hypnosis.mp3
Deep_Sleep_Meditation.mp3
Dane_Spotts_-_SuperBrain_Power.mp3
Concentration_-_Subliminal_White_Noise.mp3
Christopher_Wayne_Morrison_-_Speed_Reading.mp3
Christopher_Wayne_Morrison_-_Procrastination_To_Motivation.mp3

I haven't listened to any of them, so can't vouch for their effectiveness, but hopefully they will do someone some good.

 

[nara]

.....and have a complex about what people think about myself, HUH who doesn't.

That's an interesting point BHL. Personally, I no longer give a flying f*ck what people think about me. People have to take me as they find me. I'm comfortable with who I am.

Maybe that's something you should work on.

 

[hoppy]

So Ive recently been put on a 1 to 1 anger course through probation and I have to admit the worker is hitting a few nervous pushing buttons in the right places.

She say,s she can tell by being in my presence I'm not a relaxed person and have anxiety problems when personal questions are asked ?

Yeh right I'm just a private person (I thought) She got my back up in two minutes and said she done it on purpose to see If I would respond.

Anyway she say,s I have so many previous convictions, because I cant handle confrontation, and have a complex about what people think about myself, HUH who doesn't.

Anyway she has suggested a new diet no white bread increased exercise better food spend more time outdoors with nature work etc.

But no medication as she says anger control can be self taught ? yeh right I'm a middle aged bloke ? OK cut the alcohol as-well she suggested, as she says your covering up your feeling of anxiety and it increases anger "I cut it in half last year" I will be on kaliber soon.

But I have decided If I am going to stop my anger fighting getting arrested etc etc I have to try sommick after all what is one year of my life if its going to have a positive affect on the rest of it.

So there,s my kind of rant mixed with a new years resolution so can anybody recommend a good book Beating alcohol anxiety sex addiction and anger changing your ways etc etc would be good. I'm certainly not going to take any medication and she agreed It could be bad for me.

So anybody had a SIMULA problem are can recommend a good book Id be pleased

cheers peoples for any input maybe I could go mackem bashing at the weekends
loose some stress lol :BLOBBY:

I think she is right in not giving you medication as you are not depressed you are frustrated and probably confused with yourself and although it may feel like you have big problems, you might be pleasantly suprised what a few small changes can actually do.

Anger is something that's purely driven and fuelled by fear and insecurity and frustration at not getting the best from yourself.
Its actually a very good sign that you acknowledge you have a problem and well done for dealing with it.
You have already taken a big step forward at making yourself a better person by facing your demons and taking advice.

I am a total believer in second chances for people and always hated that expression "a leopard never changes it's spots",,total bullshit!!!
We change every day as we live and learn and i know im a totally different person from 10yrs ago.

Ive saw your previous posts and its clear that you are making attempts to better yourself but please bear in mind that it takes time to change things and sometimes you might not notice an improvement but people around you will.
When you are doing something right it often goes unoticed its only when it goes tits up do you hear anything.

Books are a useful tool for reference and contain transferable techniques that you can apply to some situations but you have to understand what they are telling you.
The best advice i can give you is, never let a small problem get bigger as its harder to solve in the end.
Do not be scared of confrontation as it can usually end up with a positive outcome and bear in mind that 99% of the time its not personal.
Its impossible in life to get on with everyone so don't get frustrated if someone dislikes you, im sure you dislike certain people.
"ALWAYS TRY AND PUT YOURSELF IN OTHER PEOPLES SHOES"
In any argument the key is to understand what there point is and what they are aiming at.
If someone is being aggressive,loud and not making sense then simply walk away as they are not fit to debate and they are wasting your valuable time.

As Captin said, people have an influence on how you behave and you might just find yourself talking to different people and making different friends.
I had a terrible time with my ex and my family often tell me how miserable and angry i looked during that time.
With my current partner its a whole different world and im happy and relaxed which is her nature and it rubs off in me.
We have never had "one" heated argument in 5yrs of seeing each other and she showed me that a quiet word can be heard much louder than any rant ever will.

I wish you all the best BHL and hope you find peace and maybe some answers but remember you are still a big Geordie tart with a very small penis..lolroud:

 

[Munkey]

If you think you can get anything out of Chinese soft martial arts I'd really recommend reading [ame="http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/search-handle-url?_encoding=UTF8&search-type=ss&index=books-uk&field-author=Lam%20Kam%20Chuen"]Master Lam's books[/ame].

Check his video out, this material is priceless IHMO, I had to train for years to get to day 10 and now it's on bloody youtube!

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y07FauHYlmg[/ame]

As Master Lam say's 'doing nuting is doing everyting' the art is very easily practiced and you should see a much calmer lizard after after just 10 mins of holding an imaginary balloon. Go stand like a tree, I promise you'll be much calmer for it.

 

[witchy]

Anger is something that's purely driven and fuelled by fear and insecurity and frustration at not getting the best from yourself.

So, when a I discovered that an 18 year old man had had sex with my 13 year old daughter a few years ago, and I got very angry - that was MY fault as I was frustrated at not getting the best from myself?

Bolt ya rocket.

 

[stevemac40]

So, when a I discovered that an 18 year old man had had sex with my 13 year old daughter a few years ago, and I got very angry - that was MY fault as I was frustrated at not getting the best from myself?

Bolt ya rocket.

That's very different to having general anger problems.

 

[hoppy]

So, when a I discovered that an 18 year old man had had sex with my 13 year old daughter a few years ago, and I got very angry - that was MY fault as I was frustrated at not getting the best from myself?

Bolt ya rocket.

My post wasn't about general anger it was directed at BHL and and this particular thread and not intended for every situation in life.
If an 18yrld guy slept with my daughter i would rip his fecken head off as any dad would.
:err:

 

[P33 RRV]

i think i know what the op is on about i have had problem like this since diagnosed with thyroid issues, docs keep trying to giv me depression tabs, i am not depressed

like all others i just get anxious and thaings every now and again, i guess all you cn do is really hold your breath you think it sounds daft but it works, mainly think about what the violence will do, ie will i go to court, go to jail or be shunned by people the end result in your head should try and stop the 1st part from happening,

that said i havent sorted mines but hey plenty of time in life to get that done

 

[HappyH]

So, when a I discovered that an 18 year old man had had sex with my 13 year old daughter a few years ago, and I got very angry - that was MY fault as I was frustrated at not getting the best from myself?

Bolt ya rocket.

You know the I before E except after C rule.......... This is kinda like that, you're allowed to kick the living sh!t out of him. No court in the land should hold you rsponsible for teaching him a lesson.
Just my humble opinion,
HH.

 

[Blartiartfast]

Not nice m8.
It was night terrors that changed me. Had had about 2 fights in my life. 15 years old, and someat changed. Was 30 before anybody really did anything. I was shown how to "anger manage" by some "specialist"... TBF it has worked really, really well.

I basically think of something hilarious, or think of something really personal to you that is unrelated to the current issue . Its like diversion therapy. As soon as you feel your hackles come up, think of your "other place".. Only takes a second, and after a while I was suprised at what I can zone out from.. Feel anxious about something.. Go to the happy place for a second..

Strobing is a similar idea which is being used more and more these days (Paul Mckenna used it years ago).. It replaces your "fear" for a happy thing, but deeper into the mind.. Have a look on Google for it.


Each case is different. and what works for one wont work for another...

 

[Jooooles]

Cheers seedy ya big scottish jessy some good links there m8 cheers sempi cheers lads some good advice thanks for all the replys hope yous had a nice christmas.


NOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW FCUK OFF them tapes must not work lol
Na seriously thanks everyone !

GOOD STUFF

 

[thecableguy12]

yes it does i have had it for years need xanax or valium from time to time but have controlled it with sertraline ssri, but anxiety def leeds to anger in more of a frustrated form though and drink does work because it stimutales the receptor gabba, so does valuim and xanax

 

[thebigyin]

yes it does i have had it for years need xanax or valium from time to time but have controlled it with sertraline ssri, but anxiety def leeds to anger in more of a frustrated form though and drink does work because it stimutales the receptor gabba, so does valuim and xanax

xanax ,n, valium with alcohol lol you would be safer with a shotgun ffs lol

 

[jaffa]

That's an interesting point BHL. Personally, I no longer give a flying f*ck what people think about me. People have to take me as they find me. I'm comfortable with who I am.

Maybe that's something you should work on.

I am going with nara on this one.

@BHL, listen pal, you said you want to change and that you will change, go for it m8 and stop worrying about what others think of you, that may be holding you back.

Take a deep breathe before you make any decisions but you must be comfotable within yourself, no sense being a fraud. Your decisions will never please everyone, but if they please those that care to you, then you are on the right path.

I am not an anger manager but even I know YOU have issues, cos you have posted about them so don't be so surprised that she noticed them pal, if you deny them you are on the wrong path.

Only You can change You.

Good luck to you.

 

[MikeS]

anxiety doesnt turn into violence

to suffer anxiety in the first place without any signficant reason, such as finding out your going to die, a loved one has died etc then you are not in control of your emotions

so if your not in control of your emotions or feelings then how can you control anger and being irritable

drugs do not correct anxiety disorders, it is whether your willing to change how you think that matters