Corny 1 Liner Thread
- Thread starter dar1437
- Start date
What a coont. 
The first few weeks of Weight Watchers, you’re just finding your feet....
My Mum told me the best time to ask my Dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I’d ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying, ‘Can I have a new bike?’ He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike....
My aunt Marge has been so ill for so long that we’ve started to call her ‘I can’t believe she’s not better’
My mate took ill the other day. He had the peek a boo virus. Must be serious as they took him to ICU.
muskrat
Inactive User
muskrat
Inactive User
I took a bird back to my house for sex last night. Twenty seconds into it, my dick went floppy. She looked at me and said "You can do better than this, surely?" "Of course I can" I said "But you really shouldn't put yourself down like that".
muskrat
Inactive User
A newlywed couple gets a special present for their nuptials - a brand new sports car.
As they leave the wedding, they are so excited they drive faster than they ever had.
"Faster! Faster!!" yells the new bride. "I'll make you a deal" says the groom with a smile. "If I do 200mph, you take off your dress. Deal?" he asked. "Yes!" said his adventurous wife.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off her dress.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car soon skidded onto some gravel and flipped over.
The naked girl was fine, but the groom got jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried. "But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!" "Take my shoe and cover yourself" he said.
Holding the shoe over her private area, the girl ran down the road and found a service station.
Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station attendant. "Please help me! My husband's stuck!" The attendant looked at the shoe and said "There's nothing I can do... he's in too far!"
As they leave the wedding, they are so excited they drive faster than they ever had.
"Faster! Faster!!" yells the new bride. "I'll make you a deal" says the groom with a smile. "If I do 200mph, you take off your dress. Deal?" he asked. "Yes!" said his adventurous wife.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off her dress.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car soon skidded onto some gravel and flipped over.
The naked girl was fine, but the groom got jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried. "But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!" "Take my shoe and cover yourself" he said.
Holding the shoe over her private area, the girl ran down the road and found a service station.
Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station attendant. "Please help me! My husband's stuck!" The attendant looked at the shoe and said "There's nothing I can do... he's in too far!"
Recently. I had bird flu. But it’s all relative isn’t it? If I had rabies and you offered me bird flu, I’d bite your hand off....
muskrat
Inactive User
Haha.....we've all been there......haven't we?
Would you care to elaborate Bob?
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