Corny 1 Liner Thread
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Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, “Esther, I’d like to ride in that helicopter.” Esther always replied, “I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.”
One year, Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, “Esther, I’m 85 years old. If I don’t ride that helicopter today, I might never get another chance.” To this, Esther replied, “Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.”
The pilot overheard the couple and said, “Folks, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don’t say a word I won’t charge you a penny! But if you say one word it’s fifty dollars.”
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, “By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn’t. I’m impressed!”
Morris replied, “Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!”
One year, Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, “Esther, I’m 85 years old. If I don’t ride that helicopter today, I might never get another chance.” To this, Esther replied, “Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.”
The pilot overheard the couple and said, “Folks, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don’t say a word I won’t charge you a penny! But if you say one word it’s fifty dollars.”
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, “By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn’t. I’m impressed!”
Morris replied, “Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!”
My mate went back to the tattoo parlour today so they could finish off a massive tattoo of an Indian on his back, he said to the tattooist, "don't forget I want a tomahawk in his hand"
The tattooist replied, "give me a chance mate, I've only just finished his fu*kin turban"
The tattooist replied, "give me a chance mate, I've only just finished his fu*kin turban"
Jim and Billy are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, Chewing tobacco and drinking beer when suddenly
Billy says, "Think I'm gonna divorce the wife - she ain't spoke to me in over 2 months."
Jim spits overboard, takes a long, slow sip of beer and says,
"Better think it over .....women like that are hard to find."
Billy says, "Think I'm gonna divorce the wife - she ain't spoke to me in over 2 months."
Jim spits overboard, takes a long, slow sip of beer and says,
"Better think it over .....women like that are hard to find."
Dress to thrill.
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