GRRR, i need to let out some steam

[Highlander]

some of you may know, others may not, but me and my ex split split a couple of years ago, and after 12 months of battling at solicitors and mediation, i now see my daughter who's 5 now every thursday after school, and every other saturday.

so today, i pick her up from school, and she comes to my house, and she stands on a stool in kitchen and looks out kitchen window, i turn round to put kettle on, and here a thud, she falls off stool and when i look at her, her wrist is folded in half, i shat myself and wanted to cry for her, she whimpered "DAD, my is my arm bent?" i took her to hospital, and she had x-rays, and she has snapped both her bones in her arm, and is now in plaster.

i phoned her mother, and then i was the bad father.

the consultant has said he may want to put pins in her arm, but will let me know tomorrow.

sorry for telling you all this, but i just feel so angry, and wanted to let out some steam, i wish i could take the pain from her arm, and put it in my arm.

all i can keep seeing when i think about her, is her wrist and forearm just folded in half with her bone sticking out the bottom.

i am so proud of her for not crying, she's my little angel.

 

[hatab]

hi highlander

dont feel bad about letting off steam here..........its what the place is all about (its not just cable/sat/phones etc), were you can put down what you need too.

Whilst you can regret letting your daughter get on the stool and want to take the pain away it cant change it, its happened. Things happen m8 with kids, its part of growing up.

she wont blame you, sounds like she is a tough cookie.

anyway give her my best wishes and a speedy recovery.

 

[digidude]

M8 kids do these things, they will always keep you on your toes and unfortunatley when they do fall or have a bump theres no way of taking it from them (i would have done ANYTHING for my little boy to have not needed life saving surgery) Dont let yourself get too upset m8, shes gonna have a ball showing her friends her plaster and letting them draw all over it.

 

[RAB - P]

don't feel bad or angry m8 these things happen remember my son bursting his head open blood everywhere could not stop it got him to hospital and got him stitched a couple of days later my other son was going to the shops and a car ran over his leg breaking it 3 places had to get pins with cradle round his leg both are now bigger and fitter than me you always worry about them even when my daughter is out playing or my sons are out at the dancing still worry a little till they get home it would be much worse if we did not care like some people in the world she will be ok and still love her daddy.

 

[benny59]

thats life as far as kids are concerned m8,{its a case of haveing eyes in the back of your head to protect them from what comes next}-----------we can only hope our children go through life without getting seriously hurt

it happens m8, no matter what your ex says

 

[earwig999]

She didn't cry?? Wow she must be really tough. My wife broke her arm and leg and she balled like a banshee. We still argue when our 7 year old hurts himself and blame each other. Like when he was learning to ride his bike. It was my fault he went over the handlebars, because I had tightened the brakes too much. You can't win with women, they see what they want to see. You can't wrap kids in cotton wool, they get bumps and bruises. Hope she gets on ok.

 

[Dark Angel]

Awww poor little thing
Wish her all the best from me.
She is as thoug as me...I never cried when I broke anything.

 

[Highlander]

guys, thanks for all the nice words.

i had a bit of disturbed sleep, thinking about her, but i dozed off in the end. woke up a few mins ago, checked here, and found these nice messages, thanks again.

i'm gonna ring my ex this morning, and ask her Amy can come round for a bit while she goes out, and i'mm gonna let her know that you all have been wishing her well wishes.

from reading the above posts, Amy's accident seems like a minor bump, to what others have had.

Thanks again

 

[huggi]

kids bounce back really quickly m8 in a few months she wont even remember she did it dont beat ur self up about it m8, its just one of those things u dont really have any control over as mentioned alrdy u cant wrap them up in cotton wool.

will the ex go on about it now??

 

[Highlander]

she had better not go on about it, i see my daughter once a week one week, and twice a week the week after, and i don't need my ex reminding me every time i pick her up, or having a dig, when i take her home, but i know i'm gonna get the comments, something like, "you've not broke anything today have you?" for a few weeks.

but i know that plaster is gonna be a reminder for a few weeks.

 

[MH]

Its all part of learning m8

We all make mistakes, I am not a father yet, but sure enough I will do somthing wrong.
and at the same time, you daughter will learn that standing on stools is not safe. but unfortunatly she leant the very hard way.

Accidents happen!!

Chin up m8

 

[Highlander]

i just phoned my ex, she said Amy is saying it hurts still, and i asked her can i have her for a few hours this morning, and i'll take her out and buy her a treat, and as i expected, the answer was 'NO'

this place is so caring, thanks to everyone.

 

[Spikeman]

Sorry to hear the news m8 - please wish her well from us all. I know its hard not to but try not to feel bad about what has happened. As everyone else has said kids get into all sorts of scrapes. Just through my under 12 's I got up to all sorts...

1. I Broke my finger in two places playing Judo with a friend
2. Nearly had my eye taken out with a bow & arrow (that had taken the sucker off) 3. playing Wiliam Tell.
3. Got trampled by horse (under older supervision too)
4. Slipped in the woods and fell on a bottle slashing my wrists - there were lots of nice red trees after that one.
5. Got run over by a speeding car whilst at a youth club (inside the school grounds!!) - my knees took a big hit but hey I can play hard paintball and still ski today even with scars.
6. Set light to my hands during an interesting experiment with burning plastic!
7. Got my body covered in 70% nettle rash playing stuntman on a friends motor cycle - we used to drag ourselves round his paddock! He thought it was funny to take me through the nettles - I got revenge on that I his face found the horse pats!

But that's enough about me back to the important bit...

Once the pain has relinquished a bit I think your daughter will actually enjoy her cast - sounds strange but its one sure way of getting peoples attention - which kids love. Can you remember what it was like when you was at school and the kid who had broken is arm was there - everyone wanted to sign the cast and talk about it. It was a great girl grabber too. I always wanted a cast as a kid but never got one. Come to think of it did you find that it was always the same kid that broke his arm??

 

[Highlander]

i have spoken to her tonight, and she has said, her arm is heavy and still sore.

i feel so bad, even though it's not my fault, but i feel to blame.

her arm feels heavy cos of the plaster.

i told her that daddy's friends off the internet are wishing her her well, and she said 'thanks'.

thanks everyone.

 

[countryboy]

m8 my wee lad walked over our cooker when he climbed for a bicky i know who easy it is ..they are so fast ...your ex sounds like a hard bitch if you dont mind me saying but your daughter will carry on loving you so take heart m8 you wee princess will get better and you will be ok too

 

[kabzy mabzy]

sorry to hear about your daughter m8! she is a beautiful little thing! but i know u gonna blame yourself and only an uncaring parent wudnt !!! but shes young and growing fast her arm will be back to normal very soon.

with kids u gotta watch them 24/7 , which is impossible, my son is the same, u dont watch him, he will hurt himself or he will hurt you, i got the bumps to prove it,

i hope your daughter gets well soon. Respekt!!

 

[leggoman]

Its hard being a Dad at the best of times mate, I have been bringing my little girl up on my own from the age of 4 she is 13 now.
you can only do your best, and as others have said it was not down to you and she is your little girl she loves you and well forget it hurts.
And that you forgive your self we cant controll every thing in our kids life even if we wonted to and get some sleep.
things happen no matter how you try to keep them safe they will find a way to hurt themselves, and god dont you feel bad when it happens but they forget get better and love you just the same
you take care chap hope she is feeling better as each hour passes

 

[JIMMYQ]

sorry to hear about your daughter mate kids are so fragile no matter how much we try they always end up hurting themselves somewhere along the line then we blame ourselves

i know exactly how you feel mate

hope she gets better soon mate all we can do is pray for the best and do our best to care for them
but kids are kids

i myself have loads of scars and bumps from when i was a kid but as you get older you get safer

 

[Highlander]

UPDATE: i took her back to the hospital, she had her half cast taken off (only half cast to let the swelling go down and breathe) and had a full plaster cast wrapped on.

she went to x-ray, and they are happy with the result. her bones are forming and back where they should be, and she needs to keep it in plaster for the next 3 weeksand after that, they will take off her plaster and she will be right as rain.

the docs said, she won't even know anything has happened, all healing well.

thanks to everyone on here for the support, it's nice to know that so many people care even though we will probably never meet each other, and some we will, we are one big family.

thanks again

 

[earwig999]

Glad shes on the mend m8. I hope the ex has had time to simmer down on you too!!