Tragedy

[craigneuk]

Alex Salmond was visiting a Scottish primary school and the class was in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.
The teacher asked Mr. Salmond if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'Tragedy'.

So the illustrious SNP leader asked the class for an example of a
'Tragedy'.

A little boy stood up and offered, "If ma best freen, wha’ lives on
a ferm, is playin' in the field and a tractor rins ower him and kills
him, that wid be a tragedy."

"Incorrect", said Alex, in his best trying-not-to-sound-too-
patronising-Scottish-accent, "That would be an accident."

A little girl raised her hand, "If a school bus kerryin' fifty
children drove ow’r a cliff, killing a'body inside, that wid be a
tragedy"

'I'm afraid not', explained Alex, "that's what we would refer to as
a great loss’’.

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Alex searched
the room.

"Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, at the back of the room, a wee lad raised his hand and, in
a quiet voice, said: "If a plane kerryin' you and thon Sturgeon wummin wiz
struck by a 'freendly fire' missile & blawn tae smithereens, that wid
be a tragedy."
"Fantastic!" exclaimed Alex, "and can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"
"Weel", says the lad, "it has tae be a tragedy, because it certainly widnae be a great loss, and it probably widnae be an accident either!

 

[danforth]

Sorry, Google Translate crashed, will try later.:Biggrin2:

 

[alimac]

love it :Biggrin2:

 

[craigneuk]

Sorry, Google Translate crashed, will try later.:Biggrin2:

in a snobs voice all together now

alex salmond was visiting ah scottish primaaary schoohl and the class was in the middle of ah discussiohn related to words and their meanings. the teachah asked mr. salmond if he would fancy to lead the discussiohn ohn the word 'tragedy'. soh the illustrious snp leadah asked the class for an example of a 'tragedy'. ah little boy stoohd up and offered, "if mah cracking freen, wha’ lives on ah ferm, is playin' in the field and ah tractor rins owah him and kills him, that wid be ah tragedy." "incorrect", said alex, in his cracking trying-not-to-sound-tooh- patronising-scottish-accent, "that would be an accident." ah little filly raised hah hand, "if ah schoohl bus kerryin' fifty children drove ow’r ah cliff, killing a'body inside, that wid be a tragedy" 'i'm afraid not', explained alex, "that's what we would refah to as ah spiffing loss’’. the roohm went silent. noh uhthah children volunteered. alex seaaarched the roohm. "isn't there someone here whoh can giz myself an example of ah tragedy?" finally, at the beck of the roohm, ah slash lad raised his hand and, in ah quiet voice, said: "if ah Daddy's Leaaarjet kerryin' you, one's old bean, and thohn sturgeohn wummin wiz struck by ah 'freendly fire' missile & blawn tae smithereens, that wid be ah tragedy." "fantastic!" exclaimed alex, "and can you, one's old bean, tell myself why that would be ah tragedy?" "weel", says the lad, "it has tae be ah tragedy, because it certainly widnae be ah spiffing loss, and it prolly widnae be an accident eithah!

 

[danforth]

I'm in the middle, you just switched from one foreign language to another!:Biggrin2:

 

[snp-g]

The version I read had Cameron in the lead role.
A lot funnier and closer to the truth. :Biggrin2:

 

[danforth]

The version I read had Cameron in the lead role.
A lot funnier and closer to the truth. :Biggrin2:

Actually very old, started as a "Little Johnnie" type, way back. Just insert names to suit circumstances, now probably international format.