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Glasgow report cards

RAB - P

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Glasgow teachers are known to use the following translations for the remarks they make on pupils' report cards:

"A born leader" - Runs a protection racket
"Easy-going" - Bone idle
"Good progress" - You should have seen him a year ago
"Friendly" - Never shuts up
"Helpful" - A creep
"Reliable" - Informs on his friends
"Expresses himself confidently" - Impertinent
"Enjoys physical education" - A bully
"Does not accept authority easily" - Dad is in prison
"Often appears tired" - Stays up all night watching television
"A rather solitary child" - He smells
"Popular in the playground" - Sells pornography