The Golfer & the Leprechaun


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May 24, 2005
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Looking for his ball, a golfer at a famous Irish course found a little
Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer's
ball beside him.

Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it
over the little guy, reviving him.

"Arrgh! What happened?" the Leprechaun asked.

"I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball," the golfer said.

"Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so
whaddya want?"

"Thank God, you're all right!" the golfer answered in relief. "I don't
want anything. I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize." And the golfer
walked off.

"What a nice guy," the Leprechaun said to himself. I have to do
something for him. I'll give him the three things I would want....a
great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life."

A year went by (as it does in stories like this) and the golfer was back
on the links. On the same hole, he again hit a bad drive into the woods
and the Leprechaun was there waiting for him.

"Twas me that made ye hit the ball here," the little guy said. "I just
want to ask ye, how's yer golf game?"

"My game is fantastic!" the golfer answered. I'm an internationally
famous golfer now." He added, "By the way, it's good to see you're all

"Oh, I'm fine now, thankye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And
tell me, how's yer money situation?"

"Why, it's just wonderful!" the golfer said. "When I need cash, I just
reach in my pocket and pull out $100.00 bills I didn't even know were

"I did that fer ye also. And tell me, how's yer sex life?"

The golfer blushed, turned his head away in embarrassment, and said
shyly, "It's OK."

"C'mon, c'mon now," urged the Leprechaun, "I'm wanting to know if I did
a good job. How many times a week?"

Blushing even more, the golfer looked around then whispered, "Once,
sometimes twice a week."

"What?" responded the Leprechaun in shock "That's all? Only once or
twice a week?"

"Well," said the golfer, "I figure that's not bad for a Catholic priest
in a small parish."