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Quickies

BRIAN1956

DW Joke King
Joined
Oct 3, 2007
Messages
76
Likes
17
#1
There were three women sitting in a doctor's office, a blond, a
brunette, and a red-head.

They were all pregnant.

"I'm having a boy because I was on the bottom," said the brunette.

"Well, I'm having a girl because I was on top," said the red-head.

All of a sudden the blond started crying. They asked her what was
wrong.


"I'm having puppies," exclaimed the blond.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I got two Goldfish.

I named them One and Two.

Why?

Well, if One dies, I still got Two left.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man had lost one of his arms. One day he had enough.

He decided to commit suicide.

He got on an elevator and went to the top of a building to jump off.

He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man skipping
along, whistling and kicking up his heels.
He looked closer and saw this man didn't have any arms at all.

He started thinking, what am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself, I
still have one good arm to do things with.
There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk
happy and going on with his life.

He hurried down and caught the man with no arms. He told him how glad he
was to see him because he had lost one of his arms and felt ugly and useless and was going to
kill himself.
He thanked him again for saving his life and he knew he could make it with one arm if that man
could go on with no arms.

The man with no arms began dancing and kicking up his heels again.

He asked, 'Why are you so happy anyway?'

He said, 'I'm NOT happy .... My arse is itchy.'