Questions you just can't answser

Dutcho

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Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

What is the speed of darkness?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for 'normal' people at the Special Olympics?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?


Did you ever stop and wonder......

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze
these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'

Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum.'

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs !

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on.......

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?
 

notmeatall3

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ROTFL Nice one dutcho :)

I can answer at least one of them tho

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.58 ° C
 
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goldie

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heheh some very good points raised there , like it xx
 

digidude

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the speed of dark is 0.001mm/s faster than the speed of light, thats why the light can never actually catch and cancel out a shadow, its just that little bit quicker
 

ukbob

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the speed of dark is 0.001mm/s faster than the speed of light, thats why the light can never actually catch and cancel out a shadow, its just that little bit quicker

Is that a wind up? hehe
Cos i'll either impress my mates or look like a plonker again....


Thanks for that Dutcho,i'm gonna print that off and have a few laughs with it...
 

digidude

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Is that a wind up? hehe
Cos i'll either impress my mates or look like a plonker again....


Thanks for that Dutcho,i'm gonna print that off and have a few laughs with it...

is has to be true, dark is everywhere before light gets there, if you take a torch into a cave, dark gets out of the way just before light gets there

probably
 

Magnu420

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is has to be true, dark is everywhere before light gets there, if you take a torch into a cave, dark gets out of the way just before light gets there

probably

you been smoking them jamaican woodbines again
 
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