Letter to a customer

[jon2005]

Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or
> boyfriend along shopping
> This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in
> Oxford: (The very last one made me laugh most ...)
>
> Dear Mrs. Murray,
>
> While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco
> LoyaltyCard, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you
> and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his
> antics.Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by
> our surveillance cameras:
> 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of cond*ms and randomly put them in
> people'strolleys when they weren't looking.
>
> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
> intervals.
>
> 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading tofeminine products aisle.
>
> 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,"Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.
>
> 5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
>
> 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department andtold shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a
> Calor gas stove.
>
> 7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him,he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me
> alone?"
>
> 8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as amirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
>
> 9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in theHousewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the
> antidepressants were.
>
> 10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly hummingthe "Mission Impossible" theme.
>
> 11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the "Madonna look"using different size funnels.
>
> 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed,
> yelled"PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
>
> 13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker,assumed the foetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices
> again."
>
> And; last, but not least:
>
> 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."
> Yours sincerely,
>
>
>
> Charles Brown
> Store Manager

 

[popi110]

nice one
done the condoms my self and the cctv
good one is put eggs in peoples hoods as they walk around and also push thing through the shelves so they drop off the other side when someones browsing also lay buble wrap on the floor from fruit and veg people jump when they go over it with the trolly and last but not least switch the lights off in the window less toilets and wait outside and watch best fun to be had in B&Q

any more