jawbreaker
Inactive User
- Joined
- Nov 16, 2004
- Messages
- 33
- Reaction score
- 0
An Essex girl was driving down the A13 when her car phone rang.
It was her boyfriend, urgently warning her, "Treacle, I just heard on the
news that there's a car going the wrong way on the A13. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car!" wails the Essex girl, "There's hundreds of 'em!"
=========================
Another Essex girl is involved in a serious crash. There's blood
everywhere.
The paramedics arrive and drag the girl out of the car till she's lying
flat
out on the ground.
Medic: "OK, I'm going to check if you're concussed."
Girl: "OK."
Medic: "OK the how many fingers am I putting up?"
Girl: "Oh my God, I'm paralysed from the waist down!"
==========================
Essex girl and an Irish guy are in a bar when the Essex girl notices
something strange about the wellies the Irish guy is wearing.
She says, "'Scuse me mate, I ain't being funny or nuffink, but why duz one
of your wellies 'ave an "L" on it and the uvva one got an "R" on it?"
So the Irish guy smiles, puts down his glass of Guinness and replies,
"Well, Oim a little bit tick, you see. De one with de R on it is for me
roight foot and de L is for me left foot."
"Cor blimey, exclaims the Essex girl, "So THAT'S why me knickers 'ave got
C&A on them."
It was her boyfriend, urgently warning her, "Treacle, I just heard on the
news that there's a car going the wrong way on the A13. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car!" wails the Essex girl, "There's hundreds of 'em!"
=========================
Another Essex girl is involved in a serious crash. There's blood
everywhere.
The paramedics arrive and drag the girl out of the car till she's lying
flat
out on the ground.
Medic: "OK, I'm going to check if you're concussed."
Girl: "OK."
Medic: "OK the how many fingers am I putting up?"
Girl: "Oh my God, I'm paralysed from the waist down!"
==========================
Essex girl and an Irish guy are in a bar when the Essex girl notices
something strange about the wellies the Irish guy is wearing.
She says, "'Scuse me mate, I ain't being funny or nuffink, but why duz one
of your wellies 'ave an "L" on it and the uvva one got an "R" on it?"
So the Irish guy smiles, puts down his glass of Guinness and replies,
"Well, Oim a little bit tick, you see. De one with de R on it is for me
roight foot and de L is for me left foot."
"Cor blimey, exclaims the Essex girl, "So THAT'S why me knickers 'ave got
C&A on them."