Blondes - don't we just luv 'em (adult)

xXx

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1. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
A: A Rooster says in the Morning - "Cockll-doodlle-doooooo", while a blonde shouts, "Any-cock'll-doooo."

2. Q: What is the best secretary in the world to have?
A: The one that never misses a period.

3. Q: What do blondes say after sex?
A: "Thanks, guys!".

4.Q: What's the difference between a blonde and The Titanic?
A: They know how many men went down on The Titanic.

5. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and the Atlantic Coast?
A: There's fewer crabs in the Atlantic.

6. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and the Grand Old Duke of York?
A: The Duke only 'had' Ten Thousand men.

7. Q: How does a horny guy spell relief?
A: B-L-O-N-D-E.

8. Q: Why was the Blonde Girl smiling as she walked down the marriage eisle?
A: Cos she knew she'd given her last Blow job.

9. Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
A: Because she got an F in sex.

10. Q: What do a Boeing 747 and a blonde have in common?
A: Both contain a cockpit

11. Q: What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs?
A: "Great Tits!!!"

12. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a blow-up Doll?
A: Around 2 cans of hair spray.

13. Q: Why is a blonde like a stamp?
A: Both get licked, then stuck, and finally sent on their way.

14. Q: Why is a blonde like railway tracks?
A: Cos she's been laid all over the country.

15. Q: What does a blonde say after having multiple orgasms?
A: Way to go team.

16. Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been playing with your Computer?
A: Your joy stick will be soaking wet.

17. Q: Why do saunas remind some people of blondes?
A: Cos both are steamy and wet on entry, and hey, they don't mind if you bring friends.

18.Q: Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car?
A: She scorched her lips on the exhaust pipe.

19. Q: What's the difference between a Mosquito and a blonde?
A: On slapping a Mosquito, it will stop sucking.

20. Q: Why is a blonde like a shotgun?
A: Give her a cock and she'll be ready to blow.

21. Q: How would a blond interpret 6.9?
A: A 69 interrupted by a period.

22. Q: What does a blonde look like after sex?
A: No idea mate. I'm already long gone....

23. Q: What's a blondes favorite Nursery Rhyme?
A: HumpMe DumpMe.


25. Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A: Cuz everyone gets a turn.

27. Q: Why did they call the blonde "twinkie"?
A: She loved to get filled with Cream.

28. Q: In a Blonde's mind what is long and hard?
A: Grade 4.

29. Q: Why does a blonde have an IQ 1 point higher than a Coppers Horse?
A: So she won't shit on the street during a rally.

30. Q: What's the difference between a blonde track team and a tribe of sly pygmies?
A: One's a bunch a cunning runts.

33. Q: What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
A: Locking the car door.

34. Q: Did you hear the one about the blonde lesbian?
A: Well, she kept having affairs with men.

35. Q: What is the difference between a blonde and most men?
A: The blonde has the higher sperm count.

37. Q: What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A: She picks up her purse and goes home.

38. Q: When visiting Scotland, what is a Blonde's favorite destination?
A: Silicon Glen

39. Q: What do you call 2 nuns and a blonde?
A: Two tight ends and a wide receiver.

40. Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles?
A: Because they can't get their head in the jar.

41. Q: What would a blonde use for protection during sex?
A: A bus shelter.

43. Q: Why do blondes have big bellybuttons?
A: From dating blonde men.

44. Q: Why is a blonde like an old washing machine?
A: They both drip when they're ****ed.

45. Q: Why did the blonde cross the road?
A: Forget the road, what was she doing out of the bedroom!?

46. Q: Why does a blond have T.G.I.F. on the front of her shirt?
A: Tits Go In Front.

47. Q: How can you tell who is a blonde's boyfriend?
A: He's the one with the belt buckle the matches the impression in her forehead.

48. Q: Why did the deaf blonde sit on a newspaper?
A: So she could lip read.
 

xXx

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they're my favourite pastime
 
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